Samuel 1.

This Saturday I enjoyed myself reading on Samuel. I felt the hunch that much of my life has been mistaken when getting things I was not heavenly granted and that I have suffered pains for being self centered and selfish.

I learned a bit more on the character of king Saul. He was big, “but not at his eyes” (1 Sam. 15:17) and that´s why he went to build a monument to his name (1 Sam. 15:12). Like politicians today! Have you ever felt you are in the wrong place or with the people you don´t belong?

Reading more chapters we see how he changed, but not for his betterment. God regretted having chosen him and changed His mind (1 Sam. 15:10) so I see here God had FAITH in him, same way He has a positive faith on us, who are invited to be loyal to the gospel and His son. Did God like David for his outer appearance or for his pastoral attitude? (1 Sam. 16:7).

Surely God saw something good in Saul character and later on this was changed and the H.S. got lost sight off (1 Sam. 16:14). See how Saul so loved that temporal role of king and wanted to pass it on his son (1 Sam. 20:30-31). God picked David and got him anointed, while -at the same time- there were two men to rule over Israel: One casted out and the next under a promise (like us).

God gave Saul a new heart. We read how he changed (1 Samuel 10:6, 9) but something went wrong in years, and this happened to David same way (1 Sam.16:13) He failed when he was getting old... Do we need to watch ourselves? (Yes!)

I like the way God tells us not to look at appearances (1 Samuel 16:7). He only can see the inner mind searching our soul, while we seldom grasp enough, but the tip of an iceberg.

I cannot touch tomorrow. Much of me liked the idea of having both, wisdom and a matchmaking mind to get my dreams, or the tools I could use to build them up; but I´m completely wrong. Perhaps some wisdom is utterly reached, but the matchmaking mind is from God´s will. I spent all my life looking for that person I haven´t found. Now I am convinced of this!

David was a humble pastor. He was not a coward boy and grew to fight his fears. Samuel´s account does not tell on David´s brothers business, except that 3 went to the military service (1 Sam. 17:13) and one wanted to rule over David´s will (1 Sam. 17:28). Are we always concerned on the welfare of the family or certainly envious of other´s attitude?

In childhood I wasn´t too often interested in helping. I just had tried to do my will, but this reading broaden my point of view and I knew that obedience is the best sacrifice I can offer God.

Too often I started asking Him things to be done. This is not a friendly relationship and, in fact, I would not like to have a friend -or a person- who always comes asking me things to be done. Are you like that? I have to change this! (Will you too?) I think love is not asking, but giving; but I learned this the opposite way: I believed “being loved” was receiving instead of giving. Of course! A love relationship is built on the flow of both, giving and receiving things fairly, often to both sides.

God needs nothing from me, it is just the other way around, and Jesus showed me the right way (but I have loved -too much- what I considered mine). Is this my life? Is this real life?

This is how I often misbehaved: “Hi, God! How are you doing?... I just wanted to ask You this couple of things... May I trust you to get this and these?”

·         Is God a Genius to make my life happy?

·         Am I His servant or employer?

·         Do I love Him at my selfish convenience?

Same mistake is made with family, friends or those we say “we love”. Think of the many times we used people to get what we wanted, and culturally we are taught the wrong way: “Ask!” (Instead of giving).

When David wanted to marry Michal had to pay a price (1 Sam. 18:23, 25). Let´s say Merak was too expen$ive (Ha! Ha!) and, in fact, Saul reminded me Laban, when that man tricked Jacob when getting Rachel as wife (Gen. 29:17, 20, 25) Dave actually got Merak´s hands by beating Goliath (1 Sam. 17:25, 27, 30) but he was smart enough to ask for the price and finally had to pay for the one he liked. How long he was away deprived -and forcedly divorced- from the one he paid for? More than 10 years and it was sure she won´t enjoy living like a girl scout in the wilderness (such as a poor woman, without safety and shelter). Will any of you like to live as poor people? I bet you do not! (David spent 7+7 years living in such circumstances, and Jacob had to live in open fields to get his two wives).

It is worth noticing how God said nothing on these two men having several women. Jacob was somehow tricked and David had forced no one to be engaged in such marital intercourse, with the exception of that criminal sin he made -being the king- with Betsabeth, where God punished him very well (2 Sam. 12:7-10). I don´t agree having two women, but I do see circumstances allowing men and women to have a second chance to marry ONE. Is it part of God´s grace? I have read how David gave Saul more than one chance to repent. He could have killed him twice (1 Sam. 24:17-18;   26: 20-21, 24) and he dared to approach that one who was unwilling to be changed and converted. I know I cannot be changed by myself but I tried to sort things out, the best I could or knew. Divorce has given many a second (and a third) chance to built their life...

There were portions of the O.T. that seemed mixed and confused with promiscuity, but those completely sinful were corrected or punished, same way Sodom and Gomorrah or when Israel went astray (Exo. 32:27-28).

From Genesis to Revelations I see all human kind under tests. Each will be approved (or disapproved) according to his/her deeds (Exo. 32:33); but it takes time -decades- to realized how we are, and how far we are from reaching His eternal goal. Sometimes eternity seems to be boring, too toiling to be reached, but it is not the same that repeating mistakes here on this dry earth.

When Israel wanted a king I see how Samuel felt despised, but it was God being dismissed by those He loved (1 Sam. 8:6-8). Saul was not fit enough. He was too high (although humble at the beginning) and his faults and recurrent disobedience made God to change His mind (for David´s sake, instead).

Once more we see how we human beings are and see things. David was handsome (1 Sam. 16:12) and I see how we lack enough, unless God comes (and dwell) with His empowering Spirit to dress us up with His eternal grace: The anointed one needed God´s oil and the complete blessing of the obedience His supernatural Spirit gives.

Jesus is the anointed one!      (I hope He helps me change to see life).    June 2013